Star Trek And The Law, Ctd.

I think I may have died and gone to heaven.   A U.S. District Court judge has actually prefaced his opinion with a memorable quote from Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan (1982):  “The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few.” (Spock)

The subject matter of the opinion is fascinating–the judge sanctions several lawyers, and refers them to the U.S. Attorney for possible criminal charges, for operating a fraudulent business that sued people for downloading illegal pornography and then forced them to settle for several thousand dollars each.  The lawyers owned the business and were effectively suing for their own financial benefit, but hid these facts from the public.

But as fascinating as the subject of the opinion is, the judge’s repeated invocation of Star Trek references is what makes the opinion a great read for fellow Trekkers.  Here are but a few examples:

“Plaintiffs have outmaneuvered the legal system.  They’ve discovered the nexus of antiquated copyright laws, paralyzing social stigma, and unaffordable defense costs.”

“For these individuals, resistance is futile.”

“It was when the Court realized Plaintiffs engaged their cloak of shell companies and fraud that the Court went to battle stations.”

“As evidence materialized, it turned out that Gibbs was just a redshirt.”

“They were not merely assimilated; they knowingly participated in the scheme, reaping the benefits when the going was good.”

“[T]hough Plaintiffs boldly probe the outskirts of the law, the only enterprise they resemble is RICO.  The federal agency eleven decks up is familiar with their prime directive and will gladly refit them for their next voyage.”

(For an earlier post on Star Trek and the law, click here.  And check out this hilarious ad for Audi pitting “old” Spock against “new” Spock!)

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